So many of us hurry through life at a pace that is unsustainable. We rush through our jobs, our relationships, and as a result, through our life lessons. I learned a very valuable lesson this week. In fact, I have learned this lesson for the past 6 years, but I was too blind to recognize it. We do our best to thrive in an environment that is constantly pushing us to do better, know more, and accomplish more, faster. We ingest these messages, while trying to integrate them into our own aspirations. Today, now, in this moment, remind yourself that your gratitude does not erase your ambition.
We have discussed my occupation before, but if you don’t remember, one of my jobs is teaching English at the local college. Despite, trying to get a full-time role, I have been unsuccessful. I love anything communications or writing. I have dreams that seem to be withering on the vine, yet I persist in pursuing them. During the past few months, I have submitted what seems like a mountain of CV’s to the colleges near me. Some have not replied, but the ones that have replied with a resounding nope! Usually, I try to take rejection in stride, this week I just didn’t have it.
I shared my latest “news” with a friend. I was unusually uncomfortable talking about my troubles, which shocked me because I am very close with this friend. Even though I have shared information that was much more personal with her. I found it difficult to articulate what I was feeling. Have you ever experienced guilt over your dissatisfaction with your success? I insist that I am thankful for everything that I have. I would not dream of complaining about my life overall. Being grateful, does not equal perpetual happiness.
“I think it’s unfortunate that these two things – gratitude vs. feeling you have no right to voice concern about something – are coupled together. It probably goes back to childhood and some misguided adult saying, “You need to count your blessings young lady. You have no right to complain!”
I thought of all the people who have so much less than I. Several times, I thought of all the days that I wished for the type of job that I have now. Memories of dread from working a job I hated encased me, and further deepened my guilt. My current job isn’t awful, some of the people are, but the job is fine. This job just isn’t my dream.
This friend shared something that I will carry with me from now on. “Its OK for you to want your dream, it’s even OK for your dream to change. If what you feel is authentic, then you have nothing to feel guilty about. Have your moment, just don’t stay there”. Thank you for that.
Take this moment to think about a couple of things the next time you struggle with owning your disappointment.
1. Make a list of potential fixes, things that will move you closer to your goals.
2. Create a realistic transitory timeline.
3. Work on your goals more than you talk about them.
4. You can keep the spirit of gratitude and pursue your dreams.
5. Goals and grateful are not mutually exclusive. Click To Tweet