Who asked you anything
OK, I admit it. I am really bad at this. Whenever I’m offered unsolicited feedback, my natural response is almost never positive. If you want to rub me the wrong way, give me your non-essential opinion and I will give you something to remember. Just thinking of it now created a reactive response. I’m sure there are many who feel just as I do, but we know better so we have to do better. Constructive criticism is a tool for growth. WE ARE GROWING
We should interpret criticism as a spotlight moment, especially when it is constructive. Remind yourself “hey, this is all about me and I am being given an opportunity to do better”. It is our job as productive people to find weaknesses and areas of improvement. I was near choking during every moment of typing that last sentence, however, i know that every word of it is the truth. During this time of growth, I ask that you not judge me, we all have our “struggle’s” and this is one of mine.
Upgrade your wiring
In “The Evolution of Self”, Dr. Leon Stelzer says, ”
Very few parents are enlightened enough, or sufficiently skilled, to carry out the kind of “loving correction” that doesn’t end up making us hypersensitive–and therefore over-reactive–to criticism. As a result, negative judgment we receive as adults can automatically remind us of the inadequacies we so keenly felt when criticized as a child.
In other words, we come with bad wiring from the 60’s. 70’s, 80’s that we have to continue to upgrade to comply with current standards. Our “faulty wiring”, is exposed when we are criticized / judged. This is not a moment when you get to blame your parents for you bad behavior. This is when we understand the “why” behind our behavior. Once you understand why you do what you do, it is easier to repair / eliminate undesired behavior patters. Own it, fix it, move on.
Can I trust my ears, of course I can
Change the way your listen: That moment when you know the next words out of your boss’s mouth will be ones make you want to stare at him as if you could sear his flesh from his face with your laser vision…Don’t.
Don’t react, listen intently. Imagine that he/she wants to help you be your best. Even if that isn’t their goal, treat each moment as a learning opportunity, you will always be the beneficiary of your life lessons. If there is any chance of changing our behaviors, we are going to have to begin by practicing self-validating behaviors.
Stop allowing negative thoughts to circle around your mind repeatedly. Instead, remind yourself that you may not be perfect, but you are a far sight better than you were 5 years ago. Find the receipt for all the insults and insecurities you’ve collected over the years and take that shit back to the store, you don’t need it anymore!
The second part of this article is coming soon! Be sure not to miss any updates. Keep up with all the latest transformative information. SUBSCRIBE TODAY!